Kaya Gravitter

If you are awkward and a introvert, like me, making friends can be extremely hard. Imagine that, plus being a hijabi Muslim and a convert to Islam. The odds for making friends are not in my favor. I would never survive the hunger games.

As an introvert, I find solace in just being alone but believe it or not, I still have found ways to make friends. I have made a list below on an easier way on how you can make friends while a Muslim or non-Muslim.

1. Do not change anything about yourself just to make friends.

Be yourself! I know it is hard to be yourself when you are in high school. Being proud of who you are will make people attracted to your confidence and they will want to be your friend. People like to be surrounded by confident people. Don’t be too confident though because people don’t like conceited people either.

One thing that I loved about college is that I could be whoever I wanted and no one would judge me. Even if they were, they were doing there own thing as well.

If you are proud of your religion, you don’t have any reason to hide it or be ashamed. Embrace who you are. I people don’t like that, then they are the problem. You are not the problem.

2. Find Like Minded People

When I was in college and started wearing hijab, I found it easier for me to make friends with non-Muslims. I could not explain why but it was like people were more interested in me and why I would wear hijab or chose the religion I did. 

Who knew hijab could be such an icebreaker?

Their intrigue may have been that one of my majors in college was international studies, so that may be a reason as to my why constituencies chose to learn more about me. Since, like me, they were already fascinated by other religions and cultures.

3. Get involved

Getting involved in any organization will help you to meet like minded people that you have similarities to. You don’t just have to meet meet people that have the same religion as you. However, I do think as a converts, it is nice to meet other converts.  I have been going to the masjid (Mosque) religiously and meeting other converts. I did make a lot of friends this way.

Secondly, there were a lot of people that were not happy with the result of the recent election. I became an activist because I felt like I had no other choice.  Turns out I was one of many feeling that way, so I met a lot of non-muslim activists and writers by attending political meetings and rallies, protests, vigils, etc. 

Lastly, my introvert self was leading events, such as, World Hijab Day, community service projects, voices against police brutality, etc. I felt like obligated to lead some of these events, even though I didn’t want to. I felt if I didn’t do it, then no one else would. I just wanted there to always be a visible Muslim at every event that there was in the tiny town I live in. In the end, this did burn me out, which leads to my last point.

4. Re-charge Your Batteries

One thing you need to keep in mind when being an introvert is that too much social interaction can exhaust you. Being with people too much may stress you out, or make you want to go roll into a ball and never leave the house. Don’t forget about spending time with yourself. Meet friends when you are ready. Good friends will come naturally and if friendship doesn’t come natural, don’t force it. 

Me and my best friend are both introverted in our own way and she is not Muslim. Though she was my best friend before I was Muslim, she was the only there for me when I controverted and after.